Okay, look: Hard Knocks has certainly lost its luster, especially when there was such a huge opportunity to get some behind-the-scenes gold with Jon Gruden, Mike Mayock and Antonio Brown … and we didn’t get much.
But there’s always hope whoever gets HBO’s cameras in training camp will provide us with some entertainment.
That’s where this annual list comes in. Each year, the NFL exempts certain teams (those with first-year coaches, playoff berths in the past two seasons and those who have appeared on the series in the past 10 years) but the rest are eligible to be forced to be on the show.
That means there are five teams at the moment who are eligible, so let’s rank them by watchability:
5. Pittsburgh Steelers
I just don’t think we’ll see Mike Tomlin give anything away. He has one of the best poker faces in front of the media and that will probably carry over to Hard Knocks — if Gruden found a way to seem fairly chill on the show, then Tomlin will too.
That said, this was funny:
The moment of levity in #Steelers coach Mike Tomlin’s final news conference, thanks to a @JColony13 question and @tribjoerutter follow-up about #HardKnocks. pic.twitter.com/E8zRmcoY0O
— Kevin Gorman (@KGorman_Trib) December 31, 2019
Other than that, I guess I could be talked into watching JuJu Smith-Schuster. But do I need to follow Ben Roethlisberger coming back from injury? Meh.
4. Detroit Lions
This is all about Matt Patricia — will Mr. Beard and Pencil-behind-the-Ear create some television magic? I could actually see it. Plus, they’re coming off a laughable 2019 season and maybe it’d be interesting to know more about Matthew Stafford. But there are better teams below.
3. Jacksonville Jaguars
MINSHEW MAGIC? That’s good for television. Leonard Fournette has proven he can be funny and Doug Marrone press conferences are actually better than a lot of other ones coaches do. It’s just too bad that Jalen Ramsey is no longer a Jaguar.
Doug Marrone On Jalen Ramsey’s illness… and now back injury
“His back is tight… guys’ backs get tight… 😬”
^ that emoji is Doug, btw, not me😅#Jaguars @FCN2go #DUUUVAL pic.twitter.com/BxdZVx8HIc
— Mia O'Brien (@MiaOBrienTV) September 25, 2019
2. Arizona Cardinals
I just want one camera to follow Kliff Kingsbury around for four weeks. Kyler Murray isn’t the most over-the-top of personalities, but I want to know more about him. Plus, Larry Fitzgerald could return and Patrick Peterson would be great.
Kliff Kingsbury just now on @Bickley_Marotta show:
"Have you ever had a helmet that you would consider leaving the game of football for?"
KK: "I haven't met a *woman* I would consider leaving the game of football for…" 😂 #AllTimeQuote
— Blake Allen Murphy 🏈 (@blakemurphy7) August 12, 2019
1. Denver Broncos
Drew Lock, rapping. That’s it. That’s the show.
MOOD GOING INTO 2020. TURN IT UP DREW 🗣🗣🗣 pic.twitter.com/Dsv89Vhu20
— Buzz🐯™(#1 JSimmons Fan) (@__AB7_) December 30, 2019
Also, lots of John Elway and tons of Von Miller. How can you beat that?
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