The Velveeta Cheese Twitter account helped us preview the 2020-21 NBA season

Liquid gold has sports opinions, too.

NBA Twitter is an insanely weird space. People from all walks of life jump on the internet to talk — er, uh, mostly argue — about their favorite basketball teams and players with complete strangers.

Sometimes, though, you run into people who make really smart and compelling arguments about the NBA and the sport of basketball. And those are the people who are the best to interact with online.

It just so happens that one of those accounts is the Velveeta Cheese Twitter account. Yes, you read that correctly. Velveeta Cheese is an NBA nerd.

The account is filled with hot, but correct, basketball takes. Like the fact that the greatest of all-time conversation just doesn’t make a lot of sense.

Or that Mahmoud Abdul-Rauf is one of the most underrated NBA players of all-time despite having a bad +/-.

There are more takes like that the deeper you scroll into the tweets. A quick Google search reveals that Velveeta Cheese isn’t new to this — they are true to this. They made friends with the Oklahoma City Thunder fanbase and even did a Reddit Ask Me Anything earlier this year to talk all things Thunder.

It’s insanely cool and, also, insanely nerdy. We wanted to find out who the basketball nerd behind this Twitter account was, so we asked. Turns out it’s John Sabine — a Dallas native and a Bulls fan who is now also in love with the Oklahoma City Thunder’s fanbase.

He used to host Bulls Outsiders on NBC Sports Chicago. Now, he’s tweeting his nerdy basketball gems out to the people via a Twitter account for cheese dip. Below is our conversation about how all that works.

Michael Sykes:  You’re clearly an NBA Twitter head, just like the rest of us. Where does this passion come from? 

John Sabine: My childhood. I love the NBA. I grew up in Dallas and I moved to Chicago 11 years ago right when Derrick Rose got drafted. So, when that happened, I said “Alright, I’m in.” I’m kind of a fan polygamist when it comes to the NBA, I love a lot of teams. Velveeta, specifically, loves the Oklahoma City Thunder. That’s Velveeta’s team. OKC, spelled O-QUE-C, we love them. But, I personally love it all. 

I also used to have a job where I hosted a Bulls talk show on NBC Sports Chicago, so it was another part of my life. And Velveeta was gracious enough to let me reveal some of who I am through the brand. 

Sykes: How does that translate to the Twitter account? 

Sabine: When you watch sports, you sit around, you eat queso, it’s, like, very communal and fun. And I feel like NBA Twitter is that. It’s just such a fun atmosphere, the ecosystem of NBA Twitter. I truly love basketball and Velveeta has a strategy of bringing people to the party. And they let me jump this party because of how I personally love the NBA. It’s the best sport in the world. I love the league. 

Sykes: I realized you were a true NBA nerd when you were tweeting about VORP, or something like that, and I was shocked. How do people receive that from you? 

Sabine: It’s funny because you don’t expect it. We don’t want to be just random. I truly love analytics talk…I have a lot of basketball opinions. I once said steals are meaningless and I stand by that. I think they’re dumb, they’re stupid. We shouldn’t count them. By the way, we hope one day that the meaning changes to Velveeta over Replacement Product. 

But that’s really what I believe, truly. And I think people being able to talk in the vernacular of a community is important. And if NBA Twitter is gracious enough to let Velveeta in on their party, we want to be able to have a real conversation. We can tell you to eat queso in a second, but let’s talk about who is going to win Most Improved Player first. That’s more important right now. That’s what people care about. I care about that. Shared passions is rarely a bad thing. 

Wait, who is your team? 

Sykes: Unfortunately, I’m a Wizards fan. 

Sabine:  I am with you on this. This will be a good year, right? 

Sykes: I think it could be a good year. I’m excited about what Russ [Westbrook] can do, I think for such a young team it’s important to have a dude who has accomplished something in the league.

Sabine: Russell Eastbrook, let’s go. I’m excited. I’m all in on him in D.C. As a Bulls fan I was really bummed because it’s like “aw man, now they’re better than us.” We’re kind of fighting for 10th and now it’s like now they’re more talented. So, anyway. I hope Beal retires a Wizards. That would be cool. 

Sykes: That would be cool. I don’t think it’ll happen, but we’ll see. Since we’re here, though, what do you think about this season? Uh, let’s start here. Who do you have as DPOY? Is it Rudy Gobert again? 

Sabine: It’s going to be Lu Dort. It’s going to be Dort for everything. I love Dort. DPOY is going to be tough, though, seriously. Giannis will probably deserve it, but they’re not going to give it to him. I feel like Rudy just signed his extension, but I don’t know. It could be someone like Bam Adebayo, I think it probably should be Giannis, but I’m going to go with AD. 

Sykes: Rookie of the year, any picks? It’s OK with me if you pick Deni Avdija. 

Sabine: How good is he right now? But it’s [Troy] Haliburton. It’s Haliburton. He’s going to be rookie of the year. My beloved Dallas Mavericks were trying to trade up and get him, but the Kings finally did something right and they got him. I’ve got to respect that. I think he’s so fun. 

Sykes: He spent, like, three possessions this preseason locking up Steph Curry and I was sold. 

Sabine: YES. Everyone is always like “he’s going to coach” and for rookies that’s a good thing. They’re 19 — they mostly just want to play Nintendo Switch or something. And he’s just into basketball. 

Sykes: This is the one that I always struggle with. Who wins Most Improved? 

Sabine: It can’t be Dort, because he’s already perfect. I think it’s going to be Coby White aka Coby Gold. I love Coby White. I think he’s going to be so good because he didn’t play a lot last year. He only started one game and then the season ended. So, in comparison, I think he’ll surprise a lot of people. That’s also my pick because I live in Chicago, so. 

Sykes: Coach of the year pick? 

Sabine: I’m going to be completely irrational. Is that OK? 

Sykes: Absolutely. 

Sabine: I went to Santa Clara, which is a small school in Northern California. We have no NBA players, but there are two coaches who went there: Steve Nash and Lloyd Pierce. I’ve got to rep my Broncos. I think Nash will win because the Nets are going to be amazing. He’ll have the record and they always go by that, so. I’m going with him. 

Sykes: Who’s your MVP? 

Sabine: It should be Dort, but my actual picks are Luka [Doncic] or Steph [Curry]. Those are my two picks. I grew up in Dallas, so I know Luka fans can be a bit much. 

Sykes: He is that good, though. 

Sabine: I’m sorry. Like, I’m sorry. I think he’s amazing. The numbers are crazy. He’s my son and I love him dearly.

Sykes: You truly are just like the rest of us. 

Sabine: He is just the most important person in my life right now. 

Sykes: I’m surprised you didn’t go with LeBron, though. Everyone is picking LeBron. 

Sabine: He shouldn’t play that much. 

Sykes: You think age finally catches him? 

Sabine: No, absolutely not. Whatever Tom Brady has, he has. He just needs to take a load off. He’s so perfect he can eat shells and cheese the whole season and probably get you to the Western Conference Finals. I love LeBron. I can’t believe we watch him. When he retires we’ll be like “we got to live through 30 years of that.” Wow. 

Sykes: Yeah, man. It’s crazy. Who is your Champion? 

Sabine: The Thunder will win it next year after they crash for Cade in the Liquid Gold Thunder Dome. But, I think the WCF will be the Lakers vs. the Blazers. And I think the East will be Sixers vs. Bucks. And I think the Finals will be Lakers vs. Bucks. Giannis will get to the Finals, but I don’t think they’ll win. It’ll be purple and liquid gold again next year. But I do think Blazers will be in the WCF. They’re healthy, Dame is really good and in his prime. But how can you bet against LeBron James? 

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The Velveeta Cheese Twitter account is run by an NBA nerd and it’s incredible

This is incredible.

Twitter is a very weird corner of the internet, full of a countless number of lanes.

For example, you have Black Twitter. You also have Pineapple on Pizza Twitter. We can keep going. There’s Football Twitter, ForEx Twitter, Academic Twitter, Tech Twitter, Weird Twitter.

And then you have Basketball Twitter, which feels like some sort of twisted amalgamation of all the Twitters put together. It’s also where you can find some of the most interesting characters on the app.

With that being the case, though, I’m not sure anybody would’ve put money on the person running the Velveeta Cheese Twitter account being a member of Basketball Twitter.

We have no idea who runs this account, but it’s definitely somebody from basketball Twitter. And not just a member, but an esteemed member.

Who else would drop a scorching hot take like this on VORP?

Only a basketball nerd would drop a scathing critique of raw plus-minus while calling Mahmoud Abdul-Rauf the most underrated player in NBA history. By the way, this is a take I can get behind!

They even have takes on Rudy Gobert’s true value as a defender in today’s NBA, where threes are more valuable than anything else.

And I’m not even sure what this Collin Sexton take is, but I do know it’s the correct take.

They also had a solid take on basketball analytics and reliance on advanced metrics as a whole.

Yes, this is definitely a Basketball Twitter veteran. Can’t tell me otherwise. Of course, Basketball Twitter actually loved this.

Yeah, we need to figure out who this is ASAP.

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