Did you have Lita, WWE champion, on your 2023 pro wrestling bingo card? Because if so, you should probably hang onto it as there are likely other incredible things on other squares.
Not that it’s happened yet, mind you. Damage CTRL has pretty comfortably been in control (ahem) of the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championship in this, their second reign. The only real hurdle they’ve hit is that Dakota Kai has been injured.
She’s apparently good to go for tonight, but it really does appear that maybe WWE will have Becky Lynch and Lita win the belts and take them into WrestleMania a little more than a month from now. It’s definitely not outside the realm of possibility, and that’s pretty wild.
There’s plenty of other intrigue on tap for this week’s Raw from Grand Rapids. Will Brock Lesnar appear (probably) and accept the challenge from Omos (no idea) for a match at WrestleMania? What kind of big news is The Miz going to share on Miz TV?
Is Carmella truly ready for the current version of Asuka? Will Jay White make his first WWE appearance on this Raw?
OK, we made that last one up, but you get the idea. This is a potentially very busy episode of Raw that should be exciting to watch live or follow along with on the internet.
WWE Raw results in 90 seconds:
- Jimmy Uso and Solo Sikoa (OK, just Jimmy) address the supposed cracks in the Bloodline, which the Street Profits would love to exploit
- Jimmy Uso and Solo Sikoa def. Street Profits by pinfall, with a post-match beating prevented by Kevin Owens
- Brock Lesnar joins the MVP Lounge and accepts the challenge from Omos for WrestleMania, after a few laughs
- Becky Lynch and Lita say it’s been a bucket list item to win the tag team titles and they plan on walking out with them even if Bayley interferes
- Cody Rhodes def. Chad Gable by pinfall
- Baron Corbin has his interview time cut short again for a word with KO, who insists he needs no help to take down the Bloodline
- The Bianca Belair/Montez Ford Titanic parody airs
- The Judgment Day gets some promo time so Dominik Mysterio can run down his dad, Rhea Ripley can taunt Charlotte Flair and Finn Balor can tell Edge that their feud is over when he says it is — meaning WrestleMania
- Maxxine Dupri wants to be in the corner of Otis tonight, and he heads off to ask Adam Pearce for a match
- Asuka def. Carmella by submission, then calls out Bianca Belair for a brief confrontation
- Candice LeRae def. Piper Niven by pinfall after a brief, accidental assist from Nikki Cross
- Johnny Gargano has accepted a match with Otis, and Balor says if Otis doesn’t take care of him tonight, he will next week
- The big news on Miz TV is that The Miz is hosting WrestleMania, but Seth Rollins crashes the show to do some Logan Paul-related business of his own
- Bayley talks on behalf of Damage CTRL and says they’ll retain tonight, and Austin Theory arrives to complain that people are talking about John Cena instead of him, saying he plans to see John Cena next week
- Bobby Lashley def. Elias by submission before seeing a new Bray Wyatt workout video with him as the subject
- Both Chelsea Green and Carmella want to talk to Adam Pearce, but he’s a busy guy
- Johnny Gargano def. Otis by pinfall
- Paul Heyman says Rhodes will confront Roman Reigns on SmackDown … or be confronted
- Becky Lynch and Lita def. Damage CTRL by pinfall to become the new WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions, with an assist from Trish Stratus to neutralize Bayley
Please scroll down for more details on every match and major non-match segment.
Who’s getting one over on the Bloodline?
Is the Bloodline really going through something, or is it just the normal stuff that happens when family members fight? Jimmy Uso would prefer you think it’s the latter, and he suggests that no one who comes for the Bloodline succeeds.
The Street Profits turn that idea on its head, mocking the fact that Jey Uso isn’t there. Montez Ford says that if he had to be the bridge that kept the Bloodline together, he’d get tired too.
Jimmy fires some barbs back, but that’s enough talking, because we’re getting a tag team match here.
Jimmy Uso and Solo Sikoa circle the wagons against the Street Profits, but KO says no to more
Sikoa learns the hard way early on that going Solo against a well-oiled team like the Profits ain’t easy. We’ll also stop with puns on Sikoa’s name. Maybe.
Angelo Dawkins gets stuck taking the tag team match beating through a commercial break, with Sikoa stalking him and smashing him with a hip attack. He superkicks Montez Ford off the apron, but turns and takes a flying back elbow from Dawkins.
Ford rolls through Jimmy Uso after receiving the obligatory hot tag, earning a two count with a standing moonsault. He also flies from the top rope even after Uso gets up, but Jimmy manages to kick out right before three.
A spinebuster for Ford sets up Dawkins for success, but their attempt at a tandem finisher is ruined by Sikoa, who hits Angelo with a Samoan Spike to win it.
Will the Bloodline do more damage after the bell? They want to, but Kevin Owens arrives to prevent it.
That Brock Lesnar-Omos match for WrestleMania is on
Brock Lesnar beats the host to the MVP Lounge, making himself comfortable while he waits for MVP. This seems to confuse MVP, but Lesnar assures him he’s got no beef and is here on business.
He wants MVP to sell him and the people on his proposed fight, and promises not to send MVP to Suplex City. “Hype the fight,” he says.
MVP compliments Lesnar on his power and athleticism but doesn’t see Brock putting his hands on a giant to the same effect. Lesnar says that was good enough to give him goosebumps.
Lesnar accepts the challenge but says they should shake on it and drink on it. Brock declines champagne, however, saying he brought the “good stuff” in a flask. After taking a big swig, MVP tries to decline the flask, which seems to be a tactical error. He tries to drink the “white lightning” but ends up spitting it out … all over Brock. The crowd lets him have it with an obscene chant.
As you might expect, that earns MVP an F-5. Sorry about that, MVP.
Cody Rhodes stays busy with a victory over Chad Gable, and says he’ll see us (and Roman Reigns) Friday
The announcers frame this as a big opportunity for Gable, who would benefit from a big win over a man headed to the WrestleMania main event. That … makes sense.
An inverted superplex, however, takes some of the wind out of his sails prior to a commercial break. He’s got it back afterward, with Rhodes down and Gable looking to fly. Cody rolls away, however, and Chad hits nothing but mat.
Selling damage to his left knee, Rhodes still hits a powerslam and a Diaster Kick. Cody covers but his foe kicks out at two.
The Figure Four is locked in, and Gable looks appropriately agonized. He struggles and manages to reach the ropes, though. Rhodes goes for a second Disaster Kick, but Gable counters with a German suplex for a two count.
Gable presses his advantage all the way to a moonsault, forcing Rhodes into a last second kickout. Now Cody is fired up, matching Chad’s intensity as they trade chops. Gable takes a hip toss to the outside, and Rhodes takes flight with a suicide dive that knocks the Alpha Academy leader back into the announce table.
Otis is looking into the crowd, and Rhodes does the Bugs Bunny-esque thing talking to him while the Tree Trunk is totally unaware that it’s him. Climbing back in the ring, Cody hits the Cody Cutter and Cross Rhodes to seal the win.
After the bell, Rhodes notes that it’s 33 days to WrestleMania and he’s yet to be in the ring with Roman Reigns … but that changes this Friday on SmackDown.
Carmella turns out to be not quite ready for Asuka after all, but Bianca Belair is
Corey Graves wants to talk about his wife on the way to the ring and sort of gets a chance. He’s still upset about Carmella being overlooked, and not really thrilled about her having to earn her way to WrestleMania by beating Asuka.
She’s doing extremely well in the opening moments, smoking Asuka from corner to corner with strikes and even getting a near fall, though she is soon kicking out at two herself. Carmella manages to trick Asuka into sending herself to the floor, and has something to say about it as commercials arrive.
Though Asuka rallied some during the break, she misses off the top rope when the broadcast returns, and Carmella nails her with a kick to the face for a near fall. Asuka rocks her foe with a back elbow, and the two women set off a chain of counters and pinning predicaments.
Carmella eventually ends up in an armbar, though, and she ends up tapping out. Asuka calls out Bianca Belair after the bell and the Raw Women’s Champion obliges. Carmella bashes Asuka into Belair, laughing on her way out.
Candice LeRae gets a win against Piper Niven with an odd assist from Nikki Cross
Nikki Cross follows LeRae down the ramp at a distance and is ringside for what initially looks like a mauling by Niven. It’s LeRae who earns the first two count, but Niven quickly responds with one of her own.
Niven locks on a choke from behind, then smashes LeRae into the turnbuckles. Candice fights back and climbs to the middle rope only to be sent hard to the floor.
When Cross gets spotted, she gets thrown into the barricade, but it was an effective distraction, because when Niven returns to the ring, Candice rolls her up and holds on for a three count.
Miz is hosting WrestleMania, and Seth Rollins gets Logan Paul to agree to a man-to-man faceoff
Before Miz brings out his guest for tonight, he wants to talk about his beautiful wife Maryse. One of the things she gave him for their anniversary he calls life-changing news: He’s the host of WrestleMania.
Oh and Miz is also his own guest tonight. He scoffs at the idea that anyone else would be as good a host as him, particularly the likes of Logan Paul. Miz hypes up the announced matches so far, but he’s interrupted by the ever sing-able Seth Rollins entrance theme.
Miz is livid, of course, accusing Rollins of raining on his parade for three straight weeks. Seth tricks him into calling himself an a–hole, which doesn’t calm him down any.
But Rollins simply wants Miz to call Paul for him. The A-Lister refuses, saying Logan is Seth’s problem, not his. He presses on, calling Rollins a goofball in a stupid jacket, which earns him a thrust kick for his troubles.
Rollins looks down and spies Miz’s phone, even opening the unconscious Miz’s eyelid to unlock it.
“Miz, stop calling!” is the greeting, but Paul gets an unpleasant surprise when Seth answers and also taunts Jake Paul about his boxing loss. Rollins wants Paul to face him in person next week, with Logan saying he doesn’t think Seth will run his mouth when he takes him up on it.
“Bye bye, bitch,” Seth says before dropping the phone, then returning to hit Miz with the Stomp.
Bobby Lashley blazes through Elias, warns Bray Wyatt and gets a new workout video back
Rick Boogs is literally taking notes while watching backstage. He might not have many of them, as Elias very quickly eats a spear and taps out to the Hurt Lock.
Lashley grabs a mic afterward and expresses his displeasure at getting Bray Wyatt’s kid games instead of another chance to dominate. He tells Wyatt to keep his name out of his mouth, but he gets a new Wyatt workout video instead … that ends with “you should run.”
Johnny Gargano spoils Otis’ MMM assessment
Inspired by the Maximum Male Models crew watching from ringside, Otis opens up with some punishment on Gargano. Johnny steps aside and sends Otis into the post, then tries to floor him with left hands.
That goes for naught, but a series of kicks does the job. The Models try to lend a hand but end up getting choked out by Dexter Lumis from the crowd.
Meanwhile, Otis is jealous that Gargano is talking to Maxxine Dupri, and he walks right into his doom in the form of a high-flying DDT.
Becky Lynch and Lita check off their bucket list item with some assistance from Trish Stratus
All four women get to work in the opening minutes, with Lita taking down Dakota Kai and the fans urging her on. Kai escapes a Twist of Fate attempt and tags out to IYO SKY, who quickly falls victim to some tandem offense and a near fall.
The challengers keep making quick tags and have the champs separated in opposite corners. Then they end up in the same corner, where Lita hits them with her version of Poetry in Motion.
Lita looks for a moonsault but sees SKY roll out to the floor. Lynch tags in and takes out both members of the Damage CTRL, and the challengers are indeed rolling as Kevin Patrick claims as a commercial break descends.
The Man hits Diamond Dust on Kai after the break, covering for two and then switching to a submission hold until SKY break it up. The champs finally get some momentum by fighting out on the floor, including a springboard moonsault from IYO.
SKY hits Lynch with a nasty dropkick that sets off a string of moves from both champs before Kai covers for two. Lita is begging to be tagged in, but Lynch can’t get to her.
Bayley lends an active hand, first trying to slide a title belt into the ring and then yanking Lita off the apron. Lynch nearly gets pinned but kicks off at the last moment.
If only someone would come neutralize Bayley … and someone does, in the form of Trish Stratus. Lita finally tags in, firing off moves against SKY, who does manage to kick out from the ensuing cover.
SKY goes for her signature moonsault but misses as Lita rolls away, then gets planted by the Twist of Fate. Stratus hits Bayley with a Chick Kick, and Lita connects on a moonsault to give us new women’s tag team champions.
