Behold the trailer for ‘Pig,’ in which Nic Cage goes on a revenge mission for his missing truffle pig

Get ready for the pig movie.

On Thursday we were treated to our first look at the trailer for Pig, a movie that stars Nicolas Cage as a former fine dining chef who goes on a revenge mission for his missing truffle pig.

Every word I just wrote is real.

The film appears to be a fusion of Chef’s Table and John Wick, an inspired pairing I must admit, one that I will enjoy with a ’00 Château Pontet-Canet…

… that I will chug straight from the bottle in between screams at Nic Cage to bash those truffle-pig-stealing jerks’ heads in. THEY STOLE THAT MAN’S TRUFFLE PIG. HE WILL NOT JUST BUY A NEW PIG. HE WILL MAKE THEM PAY FOR THE PIG. THEY ALL MUST PAY FOR THE PIG.

The pig movie comes out July 16. I wait with bated breath.

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