Washington State-Wisconsin deserves proper tribute to the gameday drinking gods

A proper cocktail for the drunkest possible Rose Bowl matchup. The best of Pullman and Madison in one drink.

Washington State vs. Wisconsin isn’t just an early season Power 5 matchup. It’s a preview of the drunkest possible Rose Bowl.

The Cougars travel to Madison in Week 2, where they’ll be greeted by a city eager to offer Bloody Marys at 6 a.m. on a weekday, even if they’re wearing business attire. There is no state in the union that drinks quite like Wisconsin, where bars outnumber supermarkets on roughly a 3:1 basis (you can also buy both liquor and beer at these supermarkets. I personally recommend Woodman’s, whose alcohol selection is roughly the size of the local grocer I grew up with back in Rhode Island).

The eastern side of Washington isn’t known for its dry counties though. Through a similar combination of bitter winters and few pro sports alternatives nearby, Pullman can at least suggest it’s in the same league as Wisconsin’s state capital. After all, it’s the city that gave us this glorious GIF:

This was not an isolated incident. I asked our resident Washington State expert Brian Floyd what percentage of the Cougars’ tailgating fanbase incorporates Fireball in some capacity to their gameday drinking and he clocked it at “7 in 10.” Based on his further estimate of “20 percent” of the folks at Martin Stadium sneaking to-go drinks into the venue, there’s roughly a one-in-seven chance that the fan next to you at a Wazzu game has Fireball on their person at kickoff.

Wonderful.

In honor of two college towns that take full advantage of bulky coats and disinterested stadium security guards, I’ve decided to combine the best of both worlds. Behold, the Wazzu-Wisco Fireball Old Fashioned.

The Fireball is because, well, see above. You’ve gotta stay warm on gameday, and few things put on your inside coat like cinnamon whiskey (blackberry brandy, of course, is a wonderful alternative). The old fashioned is a Wisconsin specialty, made sweet and with brandy — typically Korbel, the brand Badger fans apocryphally drank Los Angeles dry of at the 1994 Rose Bowl — in place of whiskey.

Here’s how you can marry Pullman and Madison and give yourself a sweet but spiced beverage that’ll go down easy before a 2:30 or 12:30 local time kickoff.

This recipe makes a double. It’s an involved drink. It requires multiple steps. It’s economical to make this a double. Don’t judge me just because I value your time.

  • two orange slices
  • two or three maraschino cherries
  • two or three packets of Splenda (or sugar, or stevia, whatever)
  • four dashes, Angostura bitters
  • 3 oz. Fireball flavored whisky
  • 9 oz., 7up or Sprite or soda water
  • ice

Put the oranges, cherries, sugar/sugar-adjacent materials and bitters in one big glass. Add a little bit of the soda, then muddle it. I use a big spoon because buying a muddler would put me among a weird group of cocktail dads and I’m not ready to say that about myself yet. I remain, for most intents and purposes, a two-step drink guy, dammit. I’m not fancy.

Once you’ve got a delicious sweet mashed syrup at the bottom of your glass, add your ice, then Fireball, then soda. Give it a big stir. Add a couple cherries and an orange slice on a tiny pirate sword for a garnish if you’re feeling fancy or just want the extra sugar.

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