Tag: thursday night football bingo

The Week 6 Thursday Night Football bingo card, now (heavily) featuring Taylor Swift

All it takes for bingo is a few Taylor Swift references and the inherent shame of watching a Broncos game.

Thursday night’s football game between the Denver Broncos and Kansas City Chiefs lost a lot of its luster when the Broncos rolled through the first five weeks of the season with a single win and a historically inept defense.

Then it got a boost, because Taylor Swift will be in attendance.

That’s right, for the third time in four weeks a game between the Chiefs and a dog rocket opponent will cater to a new NFL audience by featuring the America’s most famous singer high above the field in a luxury box, eating chicken tenders with ketchup and (seemingly) ranch. This should not be enough reason to watch a game where the visiting team is a 10.5-point underdog. And if it’s not, well friends, I have something for you.

Behold, this week’s Thursday Night Football bingo card. And, in hopes of filling this one out, it comes with three free spaces. We’re almost certainly getting a full line down the “N” column. Will we cross out any other lines?

Here’s the full card. Click to embiggen:

Make Thursday Night Football more tolerable with our Bears-Commanders bingo card

Make this Bears-Commanders showdown more, uh, bearable with our custom Thursday Night Football bingo card.

Look, Thursday Night Football is, in general, bad.

While it’s nice to have an extra day of football in our lives, Thursday night has typically been where the NFL hides its chaff. The unquestioned domain of the Jacksonville Jaguars and their urine-colored uniforms has given way to a few classics over the years. Unfortunately, it has mostly belonged to games most useful for determining draft position and testing the tolerance of a national audience.

Thus, my quest to allievate this burden by giving us a reason to hate-watch. A showdown between the Chicago Bears and just about anyone would be a perfect time to roll this out, and while the Washington Commanders have been more competent than expected there’s still the chance this team implodes upon itself like a breadstick skyscraper (see Week 3 vs. the Buffalo Bills). As such, I give you my Thursday Night Football bingo card for Week 5. Click to embiggen:

If you see it on the broadcast, mark it off on your sheet. Connect a line of five and you win. What do you win? The satisfaction of distracting yourself from a terrible football game. Hooray?