AEW Collision results 08/12/23: Samoa Joe’s rage spoils CMFTR’s title hopes

Also tonight on AEW Collision, we heard from Ricky Starks after he attacked a legend last week.

Since returning to AEW and reuniting with his good friends FTR, CM Punk has been on  pretty nice run. Can they win golf together now? That’s one of the big questions that will be answered tonight on AEW Collision from Greensboro.

FTR already knows it has a tough defense of its AEW World Tag Team Championship at All In toward the end of the month. In this case, however, the duo is teaming with Punk (the kids like to call them CMFTR) to try to take the AEW World Trios Championship from its current holders, the House of Black. That figures to be the night’s main event, and may also tell us what Punk may be up to when London rolls around.

The other match being promoted is a big tag team match in the women’s division. TBS Champion Kris Statlander will join forces with Willow Nightingale to take on Mercedes Martinez and Diamante. Oh, and The Acclaimed will be in action as well, but that’s usually the nice way of saying they’ll be on the winning end of a squash match.

What else have we got? Well, Powerhouse Hobbs has asked for some microphone time, and he’s not one you really want to refuse when he makes a request. Also, Ricky Starks is supposed to explain his actions from last week, when he beat down a legend. We’re sure that’s going to be a fun one.

Greensboro is of course smack dab in the middle of Flair Country, but there’s no reason it can’t also be Collision Country for a night. And if that hasn’t been trademarked yet, TK, call us and we’ll work out a deal.

AEW Collision results from Greensboro:

Tony Schiavone is in the ring since there’s a lot to talk about. And we’re starting with someone who should have something to say, Ricky Starks. He takes his belt off in a symbolic show, but Schiavone has some bad news: Starks is suspended for 30 days.

Ricky says there has to be consequences for actions, so he had to whip Ricky Steamboat with the belt for costing him the match last week. He reveals that he got his manager’s license so he can stay on the show while he can’t wrestle, and also asks CM Punk if he can live with his victory.

To finish it off, Starks vows to set the whole company on fire, starting next week.

A hype video is shown for the FTR-Young Bucks match at All In.

The Acclaimed def. Iron Savages by pinfall

Poor Anthony Bowens is sad when he gets to the “scissor me Daddy” part of their intro shtick, turns and realizes that Daddy Ass isn’t there.

Maybe a squash match will make him feel better. One big dude hitting both of them with a fallaway slam definitely won’t, however.

After a commercial break, The Acclaimed looks better, but the Savages rally to score a near fall, and now the framing is “maybe The Acclaimed isn’t as sharp without Billy Gunn with them.”

Everything is about to be right with the world, however, as some scissoring leads to a double Fame-Ass-er, and that’s enough for Bowens and Max Caster to seal up the dub.

After the match, Caster grabs the mic while holding Billy’s boots and declares that The Acclaimed is back. He says the duo will wrestle again on the next Dynamite, while Bowens offers the fans a chance to say goodbye to Billy by throwing their scissors in the air and saluting Daddy Ass.

Jay White says Bullet Club Gold is the most elite version of Bullet Club ever. And the group says The Gunns will head to Dynamite to prove the Young Bucks aren’t the best brother tag team.

Mercedes Martinez and Diamante def. Willow Nightingale and Kris Statlander by pinfall

Willow and Kris have dubbed their team “Saturday Nightingale,” which is awesome on its own but perhaps even better now that AEW has a weekly show on Saturdays. Martinez and Diamante are working well together, however, giving our heroes all they can handle early on.

Nightingale even gets placed in the Paradise Lock, much to her chagrin. A picture-in-picture segment is exactly what Willow needs to rally, capped by a tag to the TBS Champion.

After Nightingale takes a healthy bump to the floor, the heels rally again, with Diamante flipping the world the double bird as her teammate throws her over the top rope onto their foes.

All four women are in the ring hitting moves now as the ref has somewhat lost control. That works to the advantage of the villains, as Martinez cheats and pins Nightingale.

Toni Storm takes exception to the idea that she’s been a little out of sorts. But she’s feeling a bit better since she’s in the four-way title match at All In, and the presence of Saraya means there will be no “funny business.” Storm is upset when it’s brought up that Hikaru Shida is also in the match, and Toni storms out. Uh, pun intended, we guess.

Samoa Joe def. Andrew Everett by submission

Everett briefly looks like someone who doesn’t realize he’s supposed to get squashed, but after Joe finally finds him with a big clothesline (which Everett sells like a champ), he’s tapping out to the Coquina Clutch.

Joe takes the mic after his match and accuses the “Real World Champion” of acting like a real bitch right now. He’s very upset that CM Punk hasn’t answered his challenge for All In, it seems. Joe warns that he’s done asking for what he wants and will now turn to convincing him.

Christian Cage tells the crowd he doesn’t know much about North Carolina and doesn’t want to know much, but that doesn’t stop him from insulting the fans and the area.

He also taunts Darby Allin, promising to complete making him 100% dead inside. Someone needs to stop Christian, but surprisingly, it’s Arn Anderson with son Brock. Double A says this is Horsemen Country, hallowed ground for pro wrestling, and he reminds Luchasaurus that he’s the actual champion, not Cage.

Christian has said no more open challenges but would be willing to make an exception for Arn. If it was 20 years ago … Arn sends Brock into the ring, but Cage has Luchasaurus fight in his stead, of course.

Luchasaurus def. Brock Anderson by pinfall to retain the TNT Championship

Tony Khan has apparently made this for the title, so off we go, apparently. Brock is in trouble early, though.

It gets no better afterward, as the dinosaur pins him to retain his title, but …

… Allin attacks Luchasaurus right after the bell, driving both the heels away before challenging Cage to a match next week. Christian accepts, but Allin also warns Luchasaurus he’s coming for the championship at All In.

Powerhouse Hobbs says an opportunity presented itself at All Out, and that while he hasn’t found much peace lately, he went back to the Book of Hobbs. In the book, the next chapter is called ‘Redemption.’

How can he redeem himself after losing his title? It can only come by challenging The Redeemer. Miro obliges and comes to the stage, slowly making his way toward the ring.

But while he does, Miro is attacked from behind by some of QT Marshall’s guys. Miro takes them out when they get to the ring, but Hobbs then nails Miro with a spinebuster and lays the Book of Hobbs on his chest.

Jim Ross is back for the main event, and it’s good to see him healthy enough to do it (and apparently battled numerous travel issues to make it to Greensboro).

House of Black def. CMFTR by pinfall to retain the AEW World Trios Championship

It’s funny to hear cheers for FTR and a mixed reaction for Punk as their partner. He does have a SAG-AFTRA strike shirt on, which is cool to see.

Buddy Matthews and Cash Wheeler start out, but Wheeler immediately tags in Punk. But Wheeler is back in shortly after as the fans continue to make their voices heard.

Wheeler wins the wrestling battle with Matthews and tags in Dax Harwood to continue in that vein. But Brody King manages to catch his partner while being whipped into the ropes and tag himself in, where he happily exchanges strikes with Dax.

Harwood is able to chop King down to size, and now CMFTR has some good teamwork going against their largest opponent. King is sent to the floor, where his teammates manage to calm him down to refocus.

Malakai Black enters for the first time and is up against Punk. Black knocks both members of FTR off the apron but finds Punk has a counter ready for him, sitting on the mat before being joined by Black doing the same. All six men are in the ring now, and they just start throwing hands so we can go to picture-in-picture.

Harwood is in some trouble when the full broadcast returns, though the fans attempt to rally him. He eventually makes the hot tag to Punk, who uses a DDT to get a near fall on Matthews.

Punk hits Black with a head kick but is nearly rolled up for three by Matthews. He heads up top but gets crotched when he is delayed just a sec by Julia Hart hopping on the apron.

King tags in and crushes Punk with a cannonball, taking us back to side-by-side action for what should be the final time tonight.

After taking an extended beating, Punk is able to hit Matthews with the GTS, but he still desperately needs a tag. Wheeler is the one who gets it, but he needs to be smart to work over King. He powerslams Black and goes to work with corner punches on King, then joins with Harwood to send King to the floor. For good measure, Wheeler dives over the ropes and lands on King.

A big bulldog off the top rope allows Wheeler to score a near fall. Harwood takes over for his team, but he has to hustle to prevent King from leaping from the top turnbuckle. That doesn’t stop the big man for long, but crotching him does.

FTR hits King with a double superplex, and Punk, now the legal man, hits a top rope elbow that can’t quite win it. Here comes a flurry of signature moves from both sides, and there are bodies everywhere. Most fans rise to their feet in appreciation.

Harwood hits a diving headbutt off the top but King kicks out, and as Hart is on the apron, Samoa Joe is choking Punk out on the floor. King hits a running lariat and pins Dax to retain the belts for the House.