If you’re a chaotic neutral and want guaranteed entertainment, your best option right now might be to just watch the next Portland Thorns game.
For the second straight week, Portland found themselves in a bonkers 3-3 draw, this time on the road against the North Carolina Courage. The Thorns trailed three times, but kept coming back thanks to an ability to conjure up spectacular goals from Crystal Dunn — who had a brace — and Olivia Moultrie.
Not to be outdone, the Courage had tremendous strikes of their own, with Kerolin and Victoria Pickett (after scintillating footwork from Olivia Wingate) getting in on the action.
“Still just trying to wrap my head around how we went down three times in the game, but we’ve come back, so [I’m] proud,” said Thorns head coach Mike Norris in his post-game press conference.
Last week’s Thorns 3-3 draw involved the absurdity of a goalkeeper scoring an equalizer seven minutes into stoppage time, and this week’s picked things up inside the first minute. Ryan Williams’ cross clipped Emily Menges, sneaking in at the near post before Bella Bixby could dive over to claw it to safety.
That just set the stage for the first of Portland’s many equalizing goals. The Courage stood off of Sophia Smith in space on the left in the 22nd minute, and the U.S. women’s national team star patiently waited for a window to find Dunn (playing her first full 90 minutes since becoming a mom) for a simple finish.
Made it look easy 😅
Sophia Smith with the smooth set up to Crystal Dunn! pic.twitter.com/7xWBquUO0F
— National Women’s Soccer League (@NWSL) May 6, 2023
The assist is Smith’s fifth in six league matches; no other player in the NWSL has more than two.
Just four minutes later, the Courage offered a perfect response. Kerolin fought through a challenge with Sam Coffey, then unleashed a pinpoint long-range shot that tucked into the bottom corner.
🚀🚀🚀
Kerolin smashes it from distance to restore the lead for North Carolina! pic.twitter.com/6rn894qtxu
— National Women’s Soccer League (@NWSL) May 6, 2023
Somehow, that wouldn’t end up being the best goal of the night. Early in the second half, the Thorns authored a glorious team goal, winning possession in the Courage’s half and stringing together 30 seconds of possession before an unreal one-touch sequence between Meghan Klingenberg, Morgan Weaver, Christine Sinclair, and Smith pried open NC’s defenses.
Klingberg ended up crossing for Dunn, who guided home her second on the night.
Everything about this goal is magic🪄
Crystal Dunn gets her second of the night! pic.twitter.com/kjeLT4UVXI
— National Women’s Soccer League (@NWSL) May 7, 2023
“I think that second goal was a collective goal,” said Dunn after the match. “Players were able to penetrate the ball, some layoffs there. Soph obviously had an amazing backheel to Kling that continued her run in. Actually the joke was, [Klingenberg] was actually about to shoot it, but I had yelled, ‘Hey, Kling, you got me in the box!’ and she was able to find me.”
A goal like that can leave any team shook, but the Courage were totally undeterred. Rookie Olivia Wingate continued her impressive start to life in the NWSL, dragging Menges wide before nutmegging the veteran to set up Victoria Pickett — who only just barely got to North Carolina after being traded by NJ/NY Gotham FC — for a clinical 70th minute finish.
What an introduction to Courage Country!
Newcomer Victoria Pickett restores North Carolina's lead, with a sweet set-up from Olivia Wingate. pic.twitter.com/RO7pOCYEFo
— National Women’s Soccer League (@NWSL) May 7, 2023
Somehow the saga continued, with Portland producing yet another brilliant goal. This time, it was just about all one player, with Moultrie — despite challenges from either side — curling home a 24-yard left-footed effort.
As good as the goal was, it came with some added drama, as VAR checked a possible foul from Dunn on Pickett. After a few tense seconds, the goal stood, which may have been why Courage head coach Sean Nahas jokingly started his post-game remarks with a request to not be asked about the refereeing.
🚨Olivia Moultrie banger alert🚨
Thorns tie it for the third time this match… if you're not watching on Paramount+, tune in NOW! pic.twitter.com/WDYw0cxpAR
— National Women’s Soccer League (@NWSL) May 7, 2023
“We knew we were going to need [resilience] coming back as the defending champs,” said Moultrie. “That’s kind of the momentum I was carrying in that moment. And yeah, then it’s just, [Natalia Kuikka] drove in and gave me a great pass, I saw the space and I was like ‘alright, I’m gonna go for it.'”
Given that mental strength, the raw entertainment value and the wildness of Portland’s last two games, and with their outstanding early-season results, it seems like they should be atop any sort of NWSL must-watch list right now.
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