In the NFL, there are two types of cold weather. Regular cold and Vaseline cold.
Regular cold is the moment most reasonable humans opt for coats and warm hats. On Sundays, those 30-degree days fail to register more than a shrug as wind-nipped bare arms glow Kool-Aid red by the fourth quarter.
Vaseline cold is different. Vaseline cold forces some of the toughest athletes in the world to consider sleeves and gloves and, yep, a thick coating of petroleum jelly to ensure they still look tough, even as the temperature whisks the breath from their lungs and freezes snot and spittle where it lands.
But just how cold does it have to be to send veterans who’ve spent their whole lives between the hashmarks in November and December — and, with any luck, January — scrambling to their lockers for extra gear? What does that wind chill have to hit before they go full Michael Irvin?
MAN WHEN WE PLAYED IN THAT COLD WEATHER WE WAS COLD.
— Michael Irvin (@michaelirvin88) January 5, 2014
Different players react to the cold in different ways. Fortunately, I got the chance to conduct an informal survey when For The Win was making the rounds at Radio Row in the run-up to Super Bowl 57. Over the course of several interviews with NFL veterans past and present, I was able to separate “cold” from “Vaseline cold.” Sort of.
So how cold does it need to be for stars to start bundling up? Well, sometimes the limit does not exist.