J.J. Watt did lots of things in his NFL career. He won defensive player of the year three times. He led the league in sacks twice. He was a first-team All-Pro at two different positions in the same year.
But Watt never got to experience sustained postseason success. His Houston Texans failed to advance beyond the Divisional Round of the playoffs in any of the 10 seasons he spent with the team. His two years with the Arizona Cardinals only added another playoff loss to his resume.
The Texans have trended upward since the now-35-year-old’s departure. CJ Stroud pushed the franchise to an unexpected AFC South title last winter and Houston is in prime shape to defend that crown. With Watt remaining in absurd shape despite his place on CBS’s pregame show and springtime comments about maybe/kinda/sorta giving head coach DeMeco Ryans a call, low rumblings about a potential comeback have persisted throughout the offseason.
This tweet doesn’t quite dispel the idea, either.
đ¤đź pic.twitter.com/zcW4I2F44P
— JJ Watt (@JJWatt) August 21, 2024
Watt could be an asset for a rising young team who–
Hold on.
Wait.
That mural at the end of the weight room. It says “SWARM” but the words around it — the ones you’d logically assume spell out that initialism — go:
SPECIAL
WORK
ETHIC
RELENTLESS
MINDSET
That… that spells “SWERM.” “Swerm” is not a thing. You know what would? Replacing “ethic” with “attitude,” which, you know, still makes sense.
Huh, alright well J.J. Watt still looks…
No, you know what, I’m sorry. I can’t stop thinking about how stupid this is. It’s not quite Derek Dooley’s “OPPORTUNITY IS NOWHERE” but… come on. This required a modicum of effort (or… affort?) and got none. This feels like Jack Easterby’s nonsense all over again. SWERM? Really? You’re just gonna replace that E with an A and think we won’t notice???
This bothers me. Anyway, J.J. Watt isn’t coming back yet. Except maybe to fix that stupid mural.