MLS has been On One lately, and the league’s latest bizarre chapter was a 5-4 Colorado Rapids win over New York Red Bulls Tuesday night.
The Rapids trailed 2-0 less than ten minutes after kickoff, and 3-1 before the 30th minute, but scored three times from the 77th minute onward to somehow take the three points.
It might have seemed like the wacky weekend of MLS results was enough. Two different 4-4 draws and a 6-0 rout came Saturday, and then for dessert, D.C. United scored twice in stoppage time to turn Wayne Rooney’s MLS coaching debut into an extremely unlikely 2-1 win.
If only that were it! Instead, Tuesday coughed up a game that could seemingly be scored to Yakety Sax.
Dru Yearwood and Aaron Long both scored in the first 10 minutes, and while Diego Rubio pulled one back for Colorado, the Red Bulls emphasized their superiority, as Lewis Morgan blasted a penalty kick past William Yarbrough in the 28th minute (a sequence that saw Lalas Abubakar initially sent off, only for VAR to overturn that call).
3-1 inside a half hour. That’s wild enough, right? Not if you’re the rickety roller coaster that is MLS. Keegan Rosenberry struck to get the Rapids within a goal going into the locker room, and though both teams seemed happy to go end-to-end throughout the second half, it started to feel like 3-2 was as wild as things were going to get.
Just as it seemed that Colorado didn’t have enough in the tank to make the comeback complete, they naturally scored twice in three minutes. Collen Warner equalized in the 77th minute, and in the 80th Michael Barrios was wide open on the right to give the Rapids the lead.
17-year-old winger Dantouma “Yaya” Toure then thought he’d make it 5-3, only for his goal to be called back after a VAR check. Toure shrugged the whole thing off and scored again in the 89th minute, finishing after Rubio was able to dance away from a crowd of New York defenders to keep the play alive.
Surely 5-3, 89th minute…we’re done here, right? We can’t go further into the weirdness, it’s a weeknight.
Not even close. The Red Bulls got to the penalty spot deep in second half stoppage time, with Tom Barlow eventually converting with ease.
And yet, MLS still had a little more madness. Barlow’s penalty was taken in the seventh minute of stoppage time, which was all referee Drew Fischer had initially given. However, the game carried on, and with the clock reading 98:59 and red smoke wafting into the Rapids’ penalty area, the Red Bulls seemed to have pulled off a miracle: Barlow nodded Long’s headed pass in from close range.
5-5! The MSG Network broadcast even changed their score bug to read 5-5. Long peeled away to celebrate, Barlow popped up expecting to be mobbed by teammates.
But before Barlow had to dodge overzealous celebrations, he spotted the last twist in the tale: a raised flag from the near-side assistant referee. Replays shown on the broadcast were deeply inconclusive, but Fischer wasn’t called over to the VAR monitor, and Colorado staggered out of Red Bull Arena with a 5-4 fever dream of a victory.
It was a particularly galling nightmare for the Red Bulls, who gave up a goal on a set piece, then gave up another on a throw-in, and also got a taste of their own high-pressing medicine on Rubio’s opener. Two Colorado goals clipped a Red Bulls defender on their way past Carlos Coronel.
Tune in tomorrow, as MLS’s capacity for chaotic soccer continues with four more games on the schedule.
Enjoy the Rapids-Red Bulls goalfest
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