On National High-Five Day, a brief history of Tom Brady left hanging

Tom Brady has more than enough Super Bowl rings for one hand. But that one hand can’t seem to catch any high-fives.

You don’t have to tell Tom Brady about social distancing. The greatest quarterback in NFL history has experienced it for years in one specific way — his inability to get anybody to give him a high-five, one of the most ubiquitous congratulatory gestures in sports.

It’s not that Brady hasn’t given his teammates, coaches, and team owners more than enough opportunities to give him a little love in this instance. Quite the opposite. But there appears to be something about Brady that does not prompt the return high-five when it’s requested.

On Thursday, which is National High-Five Day if you didn’t know, Brady tried to use the holiday to appeal the better angels of his compatriots’ nature.

Nice try, Mr. Brady… but your history is less than stellar, and the GIFs are everywhere.

That’s the recently-retired Julian Edelman, who some believe is a future Hall of Famer, leaving his quarterback hanging. How gauche. 

But wait, as they say, there’s more!

As a Buccaneer last season, Brady tried to elicit the goodwill of at least one official:

And here, back during his time with the Patriots, Brady tried to do the bro code thing with team owner Robert Kraft. It did not go well.

An odd constraint, as Brady probably has the most consistent mechanics of any quarterback who’s ever played the game. Why can’t he get this right?

As much as Brady has accomplished in his estimable career, you know he still has a chip on his shoulder about being selected with the 199th overall pick in the 2000 NFL draft, and he definitely wanted to prove all the people who said he was done as an elite player last season. Mission accomplished there. But it appears that Brady’s high-five issues, national holiday or not, will transcend his football greatness.

Such a sad tale.

Perhaps there’s an organization that can help.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WATSFMnnZPE&ab_channel=GeorgeBuford