February is the month of love for many, when we wrestle our way through the aisles of Target or CVS on the prowl for the perfect card, one that captures our intimate thoughts about the ones we love.
It’s the season for romance and flowers, date nights and Rom-Coms, mushy cards, and dinners by candlelight (often induced by angry winter storms, for those of us in the north).
A token of love for our significant other is a must. It’s also highly recommended for parents, children, grandchildren, best friends, and close relatives. It’s a day that requires us to do what we really should be doing much more regularly — telling those around us how much we love and appreciate their presence in our lives.
But for many of us, somewhere on that list of loves is one that doesn’t require much more than just time and attention.
OK, and maybe some expensive purchases on occasion.
It’s a relationship that’s difficult to explain to others, especially those not consumed by similar emotions.
“You’re going again? It’s pouring rain out!”
“Do you have to do this every weekend?”
“If you love it so much, why are you always so frustrated when you get home?”
“Another pair of shoes?”
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Often as you share the excruciating details of your last encounter, like a traveler recounting every aspect of a global journey, they stare at you blankly, or not at all, trying to make sense of your ramblings and wondering if there’s a point — or an end — to the story.
I guess you just “had to be there” you ultimately conclude.
It’s a relationship that delicately and frequently balances love and hate, with the emotions often dueling bitterly over hours to the point of exhaustion.
In fact, it’s usually less love and more an (unhealthy?) obsession. You’ll sneak out to be together any chance you get — warm or cold, rain or shine, lunch hour or multi-day trip. The guilt you sometimes feel when you leave the house before the sun has risen, is quickly overcome by the excitement of what the day may bring.
Maybe all of my hard work and sacrifices will pay off. Maybe I’ll laugh. Maybe I’ll cry. Maybe everything will align perfectly and, at the end of the day, I’ll be celebrated like a conquering hero.
For many of us, it’s a seasonal love. Longer than a summer fling, but never quite the year-round, predictable and stable romance we yearn for. Oh sure, you can find ways of extending the love for another week, or another month. But it just feels … different in the offseason. Not quite the same.
Like all types of love, this love can deliver the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. Often minutes apart. And usually played out in front of an audience of strangers or, even worse, close friends.
So rewarding one minute, so humbling the next.
Yet, good or bad, strangely, it’s best when shared.
Each encounter very different than the previous one, filled with new sights and sounds, challenges and obstacles (literally), hard truths and wonderful exaggerations.
It’s definitely not fleeting and often lasts a lifetime, which is one of the most beautiful aspects of this love.
No matter how hard you try, how many hours you commit, how much money you spend, how much help you seek, it is a lifelong pursuit that can never be conquered.
And that’s just the way we like it.
We do it all, for the love of golf. Happy Valentine’s Day.
Chris Garrett is a contributor for the Wicked Local websites in Massachusetts, part of the USA Today Network.
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